Waiting ...

I was reading something yesterday and it made me think. Am I really waiting to be ready to head off on my new path? Or am I just not wanting to step into the unknown?

If I wait until I am ready, until every uncertainty is resolved, I think I will be waiting for eternity.

This I find is true in lots of parts of my life at the moment, not just my belief in God and my new found love of learning about His words and His ways.

I never used to be the one to come to for comfort, sympathy or consoling. I was always the practical one, the one who in a crisis would suppress feelings and emotions so I could get the job done, get the problems resolved, and then head off before these messing emotional things came along. I would shy away from giving comfort, or want to offer practical advice when really I should have just stopped and listened and helped prompt where needed so the person I am with could explore the different alternatives on offer themselves.

Over the last few days I have realised this has changed. My friend and partner has had some issues from the past resurface, and to my surprise I have been there for her, to listen, to encourage, to comfort when tears come, to properly understand what her issues are without judgement. This has led to a massive change in our relationship - all for the better. We talk more, are much more open and understanding of each other and our individual needs. Basically we have fallen in love over again.

Did I ever consider myself ready to do that. No, definitely not. If I stopped to think about it I would have said I would not know what to say or how to behave, that world was alien to me. To my utmost surprise, although not easy, whatever was required was gifted to me. For my words I must refer back to my guide as she once said to me "You will have the words you need.", and I finally know what she meant. As in so many things, the advice and guidance she gave me is oh so true. I once said that I could never be her, could never offer guidance or comfort. I now realise that does not need to come from me, I am but a messenger, a vessel for His words and His actions.

Whatever comes along I wait no more, for there is no such thing as being ready for what is to come. If something is required or is due I will step forward without hesitation, knowing in my heart that He will provide me with what I need.

So, over the next few days I resolve to start on my way, to start adding belief to my knowledge and see where that leads me.